Traditional Wedding Vows: Classic Wording & Examples

Traditional vows have beautiful, time-tested wording. Here are classic vow options from different traditions and how to use them.

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Kevin HA
Kevin HA

Traditional wedding vows follow time-honored wording: "I take you to be my lawfully wedded wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part." This phrasing originates from the 1662 Book of Common Prayer and remains the most recognized vow format in English-speaking countries1. According to The Knot Real Weddings Study 2025, 62% of couples use traditional or traditional-inspired vows2.

Traditional vows offer several advantages: guests immediately recognize the ceremony moment, the words carry centuries of meaning, and couples avoid the pressure of writing original content. The phrases balance poetic beauty with practical commitment, addressing life's challenges ("for better for worse") alongside emotional promises ("to love and to cherish").

Quick Answer

Traditional wedding vows are the classic "I take you to be my lawfully wedded spouse" format dating to 1549-1662 in the Church of England's Book of Common Prayer1. The standard wording includes six promise elements: legal commitment ("lawfully wedded"), physical presence ("to have and to hold"), temporal commitment ("from this day forward"), circumstantial promises ("for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health"), emotional commitment ("to love and to cherish"), and duration ("till death do us part").

These vows appear in Protestant, Catholic, civil, and interfaith ceremonies with minor variations. You can use them exactly as written or adapt phrases while maintaining the traditional structure. Most traditions now make "obey" optional, removed by mainstream denominations between 1922-1981. Traditional vows typically take 35-45 seconds to recite.

Traditional Vow Wording by Tradition

Different religious and civil traditions use distinct traditional vow wording, though all share common commitment themes.

Protestant Traditional Vows

The most widely recognized traditional vows come from Protestant ceremonies, specifically the 1662 Anglican Book of Common Prayer1:

"I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my lawfully wedded [wife/husband], to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part."

Methodist ceremonies often add "according to God's holy ordinance" before the final phrase. Presbyterian vows may include "and thereto I pledge you my faith" as a closing.

Catholic Traditional Vows

Catholic wedding vows differ slightly from Protestant versions, emphasizing permanence and openness to children3:

"I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my [wife/husband]. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life."

Catholic vows never include "till death do us part" but instead say "all the days of my life," reflecting theological understanding of marriage continuing spiritually.

Jewish Traditional Ceremonies

Traditional Jewish ceremonies don't include spoken vows in the Christian sense. Instead, the groom recites the Harei At formula in Hebrew:

"Behold, you are consecrated to me with this ring according to the law of Moses and Israel."

Many modern Jewish weddings add personalized vows or readings, but the traditional ceremony centers on the ketubah (marriage contract) reading and ring exchange rather than spoken promises.

Civil Traditional Vows

Civil ceremonies in the US have no required vow wording, allowing couples to use traditional religious phrasing if desired. Common civil traditional vows include:

"I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my [wife/husband], my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our union and love you more each day than I did the day before."

UK civil ceremonies require specific legal declarations but cannot include religious content. Registrars use prescribed wording from the Marriage Act 19494.

Comparison Table: Traditional Vows by Tradition

TraditionKey PhraseDuration WordingReligious ElementsTypical Length
Protestant (Anglican)"lawfully wedded""till death do us part"Optional God reference45-50 words
Catholic"I promise to be true""all the days of my life"Implicit religious context35-40 words
Jewish"Behold, you are consecrated"Implied permanentExplicit (Moses and Israel)15-20 words (Hebrew)
US Civil"partner in life""through good times and bad"None permitted40-70 words (varies)
UK CivilLegal declarationNot specified in vowsNone permitted by law25-30 words (legal)

Regional Variations in Traditional Vows

Traditional vow wording varies significantly across English-speaking countries due to different legal requirements and cultural evolution.

United States

US traditional vows follow the Protestant model with high flexibility. No federal law prescribes vow wording, allowing each state and officiant to determine ceremony content. Most American couples who choose traditional vows use the "I take you to be my lawfully wedded" format with minor personalization. The phrase "lawfully wedded" reflects American legal emphasis.

American traditional vows often include "from this day forward," a phrase less common in UK versions. 58% of American couples using traditional vows keep the exact historical wording, while 42% modify one or two phrases2.

United Kingdom

UK traditional vows must comply with the Marriage Act 1949 and subsequent amendments, creating more rigid requirements4. Civil ceremonies must include the legal declaration: "I do solemnly declare that I know not of any lawful impediment why I may not be joined in matrimony to [Name]."

Church of England ceremonies use Book of Common Prayer wording, updated in 2000 to offer gender-neutral alternatives:

"I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my wedded [wife/husband], to have and to hold from this day forward; for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health; to love and to cherish, till death us do part, according to God's holy law."

UK vows use "till death us do part" rather than "till death do us part," reflecting older English grammar.

Australia

Australian traditional vows fall between US flexibility and UK structure. The Marriage Act 1961 requires the "Monitum" (legal declaration) but allows personalized vow content5. The required wording is:

"I call upon the persons here present to witness that I, [Name], take thee, [Name], to be my lawful wedded [wife/husband]."

After this legal portion, couples choose any vow wording. 2024 data shows 54% of Australian couples use traditional vows, down from 67% in 20196.

Regional Comparison Table

CountryLegal RequirementDuration WordingFlexibility
United StatesMarriage license only"till death do us part"Complete vow flexibility
United KingdomSpecific declaration required"till death us do part"Vows flexible after declaration
AustraliaMonitum requiredStandard phrasingComplete vow flexibility after Monitum
CanadaVaries by provinceStandard phrasingProvincial variation

Understanding Traditional Vow Phrases

Each phrase in traditional vows carries specific historical and practical meaning that deepens the commitment being made.

"To Have and to Hold"

This phrase originates from medieval property law language, where "having and holding" described taking possession of land7. In marriage context, it evolved to mean complete union of two lives. "To have" represents the public, social dimension of marriage, while "to hold" signifies private, intimate connection.

"For Better, For Worse"

These paired phrases form the heart of traditional vow commitment, explicitly acknowledging that marriage includes difficulties alongside joys. The promises address life dimensions: circumstances ("better or worse"), finances ("richer or poorer"), and health ("sickness and health").

Research shows couples who explicitly acknowledge potential challenges during vows report higher relationship satisfaction after 5 years8. The phrase removes the illusion of constant happiness and establishes realistic expectations.

"For Richer, For Poorer"

Financial commitment became explicit in traditional vows during the 16th century when marriage determined property rights and economic survival. Today, this phrase addresses money as a leading marriage stressor. 41% of divorced couples cite financial disagreements as a primary factor9.

"In Sickness and in Health"

Health vows originated during plague eras when illness posed immediate marriage threats. Today, this phrase covers physical illness, mental health challenges, accidents, disabilities, and aging. The promise extends to chronic conditions and caretaking through decline.

"Till Death Do Us Part"

This phrase establishes marriage as a lifelong, permanent commitment ending only with death. It originates from the 1549 Book of Common Prayer phrase "till death us depart." "Depart" meant "separate" in 16th-century English, later evolving to "do us part" (US) and "us do part" (UK)1.

Ring Exchange Traditional Wording

Traditional ring exchange vows accompany the physical act of placing wedding rings on each other's fingers.

The classic Protestant ring exchange wording states:

"With this ring I thee wed, and with all my worldly goods I thee endow."

Modern versions simplify to:

"I give you this ring as a symbol of my love and faithfulness."

Catholic ring exchanges focus on the ring as a symbol:

"[Name], receive this ring as a sign of my love and fidelity."

UK civil ceremonies cannot include religious references in ring exchanges, leading to creative alternatives:

"I give you this ring as a sign of our marriage. With my body I honor you, all that I am I give to you, and all that I have I share with you."

Adapting Traditional Vows

Many couples modify traditional vows while maintaining their structure, creating a balance between tradition and personalization.

Removing "Obey"

The word "obey" appeared in traditional bride vows until progressive removal throughout the 20th century. Queen Elizabeth II famously removed "obey" from her 1947 wedding vows, setting a precedent. The Church of England made "obey" optional in 1922, and most denominations followed by the 1980s.

Today, fewer than 5% of couples include "obey" in their vows2. Couples who prefer traditional structure but reject hierarchical language simply omit the word, using only "love and cherish."

Gender-Neutral Adaptations

Traditional vows used "wife" and "husband" specifically, but modern ceremonies accommodate all gender identities. Simple substitutions adapt traditional vows:

  • "Lawfully wedded spouse"
  • "Lawfully wedded partner"
  • Use of names instead of gendered terms

Adding Personal Elements

The most common adaptation adds personal content while keeping traditional structure:

"I, [Name], take you, [Name], to be my lawfully wedded husband, my partner in adventure and my comfort in difficulty, to have and to hold from this day forward..."

This approach satisfies couples who want both traditional recognition and personal expression. Learn more about personalization in our guide to writing wedding vows.

When to Choose Traditional Vows

Traditional vows suit specific couple preferences, ceremony styles, and family expectations.

Religious Ceremonies

Traditional vows are expected and often required in religious ceremonies. Catholic, Protestant, and Orthodox Christian weddings use traditional vow formats with minor denominational variations. Learn more about ceremony requirements.

Family Expectations

Traditional vows satisfy family members who expect recognizable ceremony elements. 73% of parents and grandparents prefer traditional vows2. Older guests report feeling more emotionally connected to ceremonies using familiar vow language.

Avoiding Writing Pressure

Traditional vows eliminate the stress of writing original content. Couples who dislike public speaking or worry about "getting it right" benefit from pre-written traditional text. The officiant leads you phrase by phrase, removing memorization pressure.

72% of couples who initially planned to write personal vows switched to traditional vows within six weeks of the wedding, citing time pressure and perfectionism2.

Time-Tested Meaning

Traditional vows have survived centuries because their language addresses universal marriage realities. The promises remain relevant whether spoken in 1662 or 2025. Research shows that traditional vow phrasing correlates with realistic relationship expectations8.

Balancing Traditional and Personal Elements

You don't have to choose exclusively traditional or completely personalized vows. Many couples blend both approaches for a ceremony that honors tradition while expressing their unique relationship.

Consider using traditional vows during the ceremony and reading personal letters to each other privately beforehand. Alternatively, speak traditional vows publicly and exchange personal vows during your first dance.

Another approach uses traditional vows as the ceremony foundation with personalized readings incorporated elsewhere. Family members can read meaningful passages while you exchange traditional vows.

The most important factor is choosing vows that feel authentic to your relationship. Whether you select traditional vows exactly as written, adapt them thoughtfully, or write completely original text, your commitment matters more than the specific words. Learn more about what vows mean and all your ceremony options.

Sources and References

Footnotes

  1. Church of England, The Book of Common Prayer, 1662. https://www.churchofengland.org/prayer-and-worship/worship-texts-and-resources/book-common-prayer 2 3 4

  2. The Knot, Real Weddings Study 2025, 2025. https://www.theknot.com/content/real-weddings-study 2 3 4 5

  3. United States Conference of Catholic Bishops, Together for Life, USCCB Publishing, 2023. https://www.usccb.org/topics/marriage-and-family-life-ministries

  4. UK Government, Marriage Act 1949 (as amended), 2024. https://www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/Geo6/12-13-14/76/contents 2

  5. Australian Government Attorney-General's Department, Marriage Act 1961, 2024. https://www.legislation.gov.au/Series/C1961A00012

  6. Easy Weddings, Australian Wedding Statistics 2024, 2024. https://www.easyweddings.com.au

  7. Coontz, Stephanie, Marriage, A History: How Love Conquered Marriage, Penguin Books, 2006.

  8. Lavner, Justin A. and Bradbury, Thomas N., "Patterns of Change in Marital Satisfaction Over the Newlywed Years," Journal of Marriage and Family 74, no. 5 (2012): 879-895. 2

  9. Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts, Survey: Leading Causes of Divorce, IDFA, 2022. https://institutedfa.com

Questions fréquentes

What are the traditional wedding vows?
I take you to be my lawfully wedded wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part.
Can you modify traditional vows?
Yes, many couples keep the traditional structure but add personal elements or remove phrases that don't resonate.
Are traditional vows religious?
Not necessarily. While they originate from religious ceremonies, the standard wording is used in civil ceremonies too.
Do traditional vows include 'obey'?
The word 'obey' was removed from most traditional vows in the 1920s-1980s, though some religious ceremonies still offer it as an option.
How long are traditional wedding vows?
Traditional vows typically take 30-45 seconds to recite and contain 40-60 words depending on the tradition.
What does 'till death do us part' mean?
This phrase signifies a lifelong commitment that ends only with death, originating from the 1549 Book of Common Prayer.
Can you use traditional vows in a civil ceremony?
Yes, civil ceremonies can include traditional vow wording as long as the legally required declaration of marriage is also made.
What's the difference between Protestant and Catholic vows?
Protestant vows typically say 'till death do us part' while Catholic vows say 'all the days of my life.' Catholic vows also emphasize accepting children.
Are traditional vows the same worldwide?
No, traditional vows vary by country. UK vows require specific legal wording, while US and Australian ceremonies have more flexibility.
Can same-sex couples use traditional vows?
Yes, same-sex couples can use traditional vows with appropriate pronoun changes, and most choose traditional or traditional-inspired vows.

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