Best Man Speech: How to Write & Deliver in 2025

A great best man speech lasts 5-7 minutes, balances humor with heart, and ends with a clear toast. The formula: introduce yourself, share one meaningful story about the groom, welcome the new spouse, and raise your glass. Follow the "more toast than roast" principle—60% heartfelt sentiment, 40% gentle humor¹².

Quick Reference: Best Man Speech Essentials

Speech Length by Region

Best man speech expectations vary significantly across English-speaking countries¹³⁴.

In the UK, the best man traditionally reads messages from absent guests before launching into his speech¹. Australian weddings uniquely position the groom's speech after the best man⁴. For more on speech timing, see our guide on reception order of events.

Speech Structure

Opening (30-60 seconds)

Include:

• Introduce yourself and your relationship to the groom
• Thank the couple for the honor
• One light joke to break tension

Skip: Clichés like "For those who don't know me..." and lengthy preambles.

Middle (4-5 minutes)

Focus on 1-2 specific stories that reveal character, not generic praise².

Four-part framework:

1. Your history (45-60 sec): How you met, shared experiences
2. The defining story (90-120 sec): One story showing his character
3. The couple's story (60-90 sec): When you noticed he'd met someone special
4. Partner acknowledgment (45-60 sec): Welcome them into your circle

Closing (30-60 seconds)

Structure:

1. Wisdom or wish for the couple
2. Clear invitation: "Please raise your glasses"
3. Toast: "To [names]—[specific wish]. To [names]!"

What to Include

Must-Haves

• Your relationship to the groom—why your perspective matters
• One specific story—not generic "he's a great guy" but a real moment
• Genuine compliment to the groom
• Welcome to the new spouse
• Clear toast at the end¹

Nice-to-Haves

• How the couple met (groom's version)
• What he said about partner early on
• Quick thanks to hosts
• Message from absent loved ones (especially UK tradition)¹

What to Avoid

Never Mention

Common Mistakes

• Inside jokes nobody else understands
• Stories that drag—keep anecdotes tight
• Excessive roasting—follow the 60/40 rule²
• Making it about yourself—you're the narrator, not the protagonist
• Reading from phone—use note cards instead
• Drinking too much beforehand—one drink maximum before speaking¹

Regional Traditions

United States

The best man speaks last in the traditional order, after father of the bride and groom. Speeches prioritize entertainment, running 3-5 minutes with casual tone and strong humor emphasis³.

United Kingdom

More formal approach. The speech follows the groom and traditionally includes reading messages from absent guests. Length runs 5-8 minutes with structured thank-yous and proper toasting protocol. Debrett's recommends it be "a witty and entertaining account of the groom, and a sincere reflection on their friendship"¹.

Australia

Unique speech order: the groom speaks after the best man, allowing him to respond⁴. Length is 2-5 minutes, with experts noting that "about five minutes is perfect—under two minutes means you're not thanking all the people you need to"². Philosophy: "more toast than roast."

Canada

Blended approach varying by region. Eastern provinces lean toward UK formality; western provinces favor US casualness. When uncertain, aim for the 5-minute balanced approach that satisfies both traditions.

Sample Speech Template

[OPENING—30 seconds]

Good evening, everyone. I'm [Name], [Groom]'s best man and
[relationship—college roommate, childhood friend, brother].
Thank you, [Groom] and [Partner], for this honor.

[Light joke to break tension]

[MIDDLE—4 minutes]

I met [Groom] [specific time/place]. What struck me then
was [character trait].

[One specific story that reveals character—begin, middle, end]

When [Groom] met [Partner], something changed. He [specific
behavioral shift]. I knew then this was different.

[Partner], you've brought out the best in him. Welcome to
[our family/friend group].

[CLOSING—30 seconds]

Please stand and raise your glasses.

To [Groom] and [Partner]: [Specific wish in 8-12 words].
To [Groom] and [Partner]!

For humor inspiration, explore our collection of funny wedding messages.

Delivery Tips

Before

• Practice 5+ times out loud¹²—silent reading doesn't prepare you for speaking
• Time yourself—nerves cause rushing, add buffer content
• Limit alcohol—one drink maximum before speaking¹
• Prepare note cards with bullet points, not full pages

During

• Eye contact—scan different sections of the room
• Speak slowly—20-30% slower than feels natural
• Pause for laughter—let it crest before continuing
• End clearly—raise glass visibly, deliver toast, drink

Managing Nerves

• Box breathing: 4 counts in, 4 hold, 4 out, 4 hold
• Arrive early to familiarize yourself with the room
• Remember: audiences want you to succeed
• Have a reset phrase: "Let me back up for a moment" buys recovery time

Final Checklist

Weeks before:

• Draft complete speech (700-1,000 words)
• Time at 5-7 minutes
• Get feedback from someone who knows the couple

Days before:

• Memorize opening and closing
• Create note cards for middle section
• Practice 5+ times out loud

Wedding day:

• Limit alcohol before speaking
• Review notes once before speeches
• Box breathing before standing
• Deliver with eye contact and clear toast

Sources and References