Second Wedding Etiquette & Planning Guide 2025

Second weddings are fully appropriate celebrations with no etiquette restrictions on size, formality, or attire—you can have as grand or intimate an event as you wish.¹ With approximately 40% of new marriages including at least one previously married partner, encore weddings have become a normal and celebrated part of modern wedding culture.² The average second wedding costs $15,000-$22,000 USD compared to $35,000+ for first weddings, reflecting couples' preference for meaningful celebrations over elaborate productions.³

What Makes Second Weddings Different

Second marriages represent a significant portion of weddings today. According to Pew Research, 66% of divorced adults go on to remarry, and remarriages account for roughly 15% of all weddings annually.² The cultural stigma that once surrounded second marriages has largely disappeared, replaced by recognition that finding love again deserves celebration.

The practical differences between first and second weddings typically reflect life stage rather than etiquette restrictions:

Second-time couples often know exactly what they want—and what they don't. Many prioritize quality over quantity, choosing meaningful venues and vendors while keeping guest lists more intimate.⁴

Planning Your Second Wedding

Scale Options

Second weddings come in all sizes. Popular formats include:

• Courthouse or registry office: Simple, legal ceremony followed by a dinner
• Intimate ceremony: 20-50 guests at a meaningful venue
• Destination wedding: Combining the celebration with a honeymoon
• Full celebration: A traditional wedding with 100+ guests

There's no "correct" size for a second wedding. Choose what reflects your relationship and comfort level.¹

Timing Considerations

Legally, you can remarry as soon as your divorce is finalized (or after any court-mandated waiting period). Emotionally, most relationship experts suggest taking time to process the end of one relationship before committing to another. There's no required timeline—some couples marry within a year of meeting, while others wait several years.

Weekend weddings remain popular, but second-time couples often embrace non-traditional timing. Weekday ceremonies can reduce venue costs by 25-40% in most markets.⁵

Second Wedding Etiquette Guide

Who Pays?

The couple typically funds their second wedding.¹ Parents may offer to contribute, but there's no expectation that they will—especially if they helped fund a first wedding. Many second-time couples are established in their careers and prefer the independence of paying their own way.

Can You Wear White?

Yes, absolutely. The old "rule" about second-time brides avoiding white is thoroughly outdated.⁶ You can wear a traditional white gown, a colored dress, a jumpsuit, or whatever makes you feel confident. The same applies to veils, trains, and other traditional bridal elements—they're all appropriate choices.

For ideas on what to wear, consider what suits the formality and venue of your celebration.

Bridal Party

You can have bridesmaids and groomsmen at a second wedding. Many couples opt for smaller wedding parties—perhaps a maid/matron of honor and best man only—but there's no rule against a full bridal party.¹

Consider whether close friends from your first marriage would feel comfortable participating again, and don't assume they're willing to take on the expense and time commitment a second time.

Registry and Gifts

Creating a registry for a second wedding is appropriate, though your approach may differ from a first marriage.⁷ Since you likely have household basics, consider:

• Honeymoon fund contributions
• Experience gifts (cooking classes, spa days, travel)
• Upgrade items (premium cookware, quality linens)
• Charity donations in your honor

For detailed guidance on second wedding gifts, including appropriate amounts and gift ideas, see our dedicated article.

Invitation Wording

Keep it simple. There's no need to mention that it's a second wedding—your guests already know. Standard invitation wording works perfectly:

Together with their families, Sarah Johnson and Michael Williams request the pleasure of your company at their wedding...

Including Children from Previous Relationships

Many second weddings involve blending families, making children's involvement an important consideration. The key is matching participation to each child's age and comfort level.

Age-Appropriate Roles

Important: If a child doesn't want to participate, respect their choice. Emotional comfort matters more than photo opportunities.⁸

Unity Ceremony Ideas for Blended Families

Incorporating children into the ceremony can help them feel valued in the new family structure:

• Sand ceremony: Each family member pours different colored sand into a single vessel, symbolizing the blending of lives
• Family medallion: Present children with a special medallion, pendant, or ring after the couple exchanges rings
• Family puzzle: Each member brings a puzzle piece forward to complete a family puzzle
• Family vows: The couple includes promises to the children alongside their vows to each other
• Handfasting with family colors: Use colored cords representing each family member⁸

Regional Considerations

Wedding traditions and legal requirements vary by country and region.

United States

Courthouse remarriages are common and practical—some counties offer same-day ceremonies for under $100.⁹ Each state has different marriage license requirements, though the process is identical for first and subsequent marriages. You'll need to provide proof your previous marriage ended (divorce decree or death certificate).

Remarriage rates vary by region, with higher rates in the South and lower rates in the Northeast.²

United Kingdom

Registry office weddings are popular for second marriages, offering simple legal ceremonies from £50-£450 depending on location.¹⁰ Church of England remarriage policies have relaxed significantly, though individual vicars may still decline to perform ceremonies for divorced individuals.

The average UK wedding costs £21,990-£23,420, with second weddings typically running 30-40% less.⁵

Australia

Australian weddings require a Notice of Intended Marriage (NOIM) filed at least 30 days before the ceremony, regardless of whether it's a first or subsequent marriage.¹¹ Celebrants are common for both civil and non-religious ceremonies, offering flexibility in venue and style.

Australian couples increasingly opt for "wishing well" cash contributions rather than traditional registries, particularly for second marriages.¹²

Canada

Marriage license requirements vary by province, with costs ranging from $100-$160 CAD.¹³ The process is identical for first and subsequent marriages, requiring valid ID and proof of divorce or death of a previous spouse.

Budget and Cost Considerations

Second weddings typically cost significantly less than first weddings, though couples can spend as much or as little as they choose.

Where Second-Time Couples Save

The reduced costs typically come from:

• Smaller guest lists: 50-80 guests vs. 120-150
• Simplified décor: Focus on what matters most
• Fewer pre-wedding events: Skipping engagement parties, showers
• Weekday or off-season timing: 25-40% venue savings
• Self-funding mentality: Spending within comfortable means rather than stretching budgets

Guest List Considerations

Handling Friends from Your First Marriage

Some mutual friends may feel awkward—acknowledge this reality. Consider:

• Whether they have ongoing relationships with your ex
• How they've supported you through your divorce
• Whether their presence would feel natural or forced

There's no obligation to maintain identical social circles across marriages.

Ex-Spouse Attendance

Inviting an ex-spouse is rare and only appropriate when you have a genuinely amicable relationship and all parties—including your new partner and any children—are comfortable with their presence. When in doubt, skip the invitation.

Balancing Blended Families

If both partners have children and extended families, guest lists can grow quickly. Setting clear parameters early (adults only, immediate family plus close friends) helps manage numbers and expectations.

The Bottom Line

Second weddings celebrate love found again, and there are no outdated etiquette rules standing in your way. You can wear white, have a bridal party, register for gifts, and throw as large or intimate a celebration as you wish.

Key takeaways:

• Size doesn't matter—celebrate however feels authentic to you
• The couple typically pays—but parental contributions are welcome
• White is fine—so is any other color you love
• Children matter—involve them thoughtfully if blending families
• Guest lists can be smaller—quality over quantity often wins

Your second wedding is a chance to create the celebration that reflects who you are now, informed by what you've learned about yourself and relationships. Make it yours.

Sources and References